ow Long to Breastfeed a Picky Eater?

A 20-month-old toddler who is still nursing but only eats a limited variety of foods is a concern many parents share. Husbands often believe that stopping breastfeeding would make the toddler get hungry enough to eat better — bigger quantities and a better variety of food. However, it is not as simple as this.

Why a Picky Eater is Normal

What a toddler is doing in this situation is very usual and normal. Stopping breastfeeding will not automatically make a picky eater better.

Backed by Science

It helps husbands to understand the concept of "mommy brain." When you grow a baby, you also grow an area in your brain that prompts you to do the best for your baby and feel right about it. The World Health Organization recommends breastfeeding for at least two years. Breastmilk is alive with nutrients that build a healthier immune system and a healthier body and brain for your baby. The head-to-toe benefits, especially for smartness and brain development, show that the longer you breastfeed the better for you and baby.

Minimal Weight Gain

If your toddler is gaining weight normally, pooping once or twice a day, and is happy and healthy, most likely he is getting enough to eat. It's usual for toddlers to eat much less between one and two years because they don't grow as fast as they did in the first year. The average toddler gains only five pounds between one and two years, yet they triple their birth weight in the first year. While it is good for toddlers to learn to enjoy many different foods, mother's milk is important as backup nutrition.

Get Creative

Your toddler has a toddler-size tummy, about the size of his fist. Better to let him nibble, or graze, all day long. Fill half the nibble tray with his favorite healthy foods (called "grow foods") and the other half with new foods.

Toddlers love to dip, so he is likely to dip his favorite foods and some less favorite foods like steamed broccoli florets into new dips such as yogurt, hummus, guacamole, or cheese. "Sneakies" also work well — blending in (as in making a fruit smoothie with spinach added), or sneaking in small bits of the foods you want him to eat camouflaged with the foods he likes to eat.

Try Filling Foods

High-fat foods that are especially filling for toddler tummies are: salmon, avocado, eggs, and nut butters — all foods that pack a lot of nutrition in a small volume. Also, it is very normal for picky-eating toddlers to go up and down for food preferences, loving avocado one week but not touching it the next.

Partner Communication

Since tension with your husband over this concern has cropped up, have a romantic dinner or some "couch time" and discuss his concerns point by point, calmly. Talk with him about the concept of "mommy brain," asking him to trust your God-given maternal instinct. Bullet-point the list of the scientific facts supporting extended breastfeeding and share them with him.

The message he can receive: "Honey, I appreciate your concern as to what you think is best for our little guy. Yet, how we feed and care for him now is the best long-term investment we'll ever make. I need you to trust my instinct that what we are doing is best and I really need your support."

Make the point that the better you care for each other, the better you can care for your toddler. Also, tell your husband about how tension, or "vibes," between parents can be picked up by your child. Share with him, "I want our son to feel that he has two happy parents who love him and each other."